" What?" Just look at Hannah and Elizabeth. They're afraid of bugs and animalsand loud noises. Sarah is afraid of dirt and tearing her clothes. Whocan...live like that?" But you're afraid of stuff too, Josiah," I said, touching him on thenose with my forefinger."I'm not afraid of nothing!" Soap and water!" Oh, mom!" We both laughed at that, and then he jumped up and ran off insearch of danger. I got up and finished hanging out the laundry.Nathan got home before supper, so he sat at the kitchen. He went down and I slapped him hard on the top of his head. "I better not see that attitude again. You're the cuck and I'm the bull. YOU HAVE A JOB TO DO! I was a giant and he was the mouse. I love it.I stood back with legs spread and my hands on my hips like Superman. "Now crawl over here and ask me nicely if you may clean my cock." He was literally crying and I could see real fear in his eyes. The little man crawled over and looked up into my eyes. "My I please be allowed to clean your cock?'. I had managed to fall back to sleep just before day break. When I awoke again I heard her and her father in the kitchen and smelled breakfast cooking and fresh brewed coffee in the air. I had the covers over my head so and was facing toward the couch so when I awoke they couldn't tell if I was or not as I hadn't yet moved much. I could hear them talking and heard a kiss or two and then heard her warn her dad that I could wake up at any moment. I finally got off the couch when I heard her. It gave me a chance to get out of the house, as I went about the errands all I could think about was how I felt, alone, scared, and was I a queer? I knew what had happened wasn’t right, wasn’t natural as we were supposed to fall in love with a man. In the last 4 months or so I had left home, lost my virginity, and not only that had sex with my friend. Now I was back home and the one woman who I’d always looked up to wanted me to make love to her. My letters to her had apparently triggered what.
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